Since reading about existentialism and its basics I have made a few changes to how I think and view the world. With that said I still have flashes of anxiety when my mind shifts back to old ways and trys to grasp the inevitable.All in all with an existentialists viewpoint it allows the anxiety to pass by and helps me concentrate on the crux of it all. Living authentically helps, not easily put into practice however it helps and is allowing me to move direction and see the positive in both myself and the world.

I am still hitting a few brickwalls though, I think they call that life and have to front the magistrates court on the 21st June on a charge of obscene language. Yep had another bender however this time was confronted by a couple of pimple faced constables who still think that saying fuck in public is being a public nuisance. It should be amusing as this 45 year old fronts the magistrate and trys to explain what he was doing out at 3.30am and full of piss and bad manners. They normally leave me alone as I have never been charged with this sort of shit before, I see them, they see me and I have never antagonized them and made their job harder than what it is. I am not looking forward to the charge sheet as I really dont know what happened except I know I took offence to being told that swearing in public is an offence. At 3.30am there was no older people, young kids or anyone who would have given a fuck anyway. I make it a point never to swear in front of those that dont need that sort of shit. So yeh it should be a good waste of a morning for the court and the $100.00 fine that goes with it all.